Laconic
by EndlessLunacy
Summary: When Komui sends Allen and Kanda on a mission together, buried feelings rise to the surface. Can those feelings be contained, or will they end up destroying everything? Allen-centric.


**Disclaimer:** All DGM characters in this story belong to Hoshino Katsura, creator of -man.

 **A/N:**

This is set before Destruction of the Black Order arc, and after the Invasion arc.

* * *

.

* * *

"Get up, Moyashi."

Allen coughed, wiping his mouth. He struggled to his feet, using the tree beside him to pull himself up.

 _Kanda really does not know the meaning of holding back._ Allen glared at Kanda.

Kanda's grim expression did not change even under Allen's fierce glare.

"Hurry up. It's almost midnight." Kanda frowned at Allen.

"…Mm. I know. Just one last time." Allen quietly replied, staring at the leaf covered ground of the forest.

Kanda only gave a curt nod in reply and raised his sword. Mugen was still not fully repaired, but because they had a mission, Komui had tried his very best to repair Mugen to a certain extent. Further improvements would be made once they returned.

The soft clink of the sword in Kanda's grip was all the warning Allen got before Kanda came flying at him.

Allen dodged, looking for an opening as Kanda attacked him.

Really, what was Komui thinking? Sending Allen and Kanda on a mission together was equivalent to a disaster waiting to happen. Of course, the chaos that happened when Komui announced the chosen people for this mission was only stopped by Lenalee.

In Komui's defense, he had claimed that the mission was simple and it would give both Allen and Kanda a well-deserved break (and to save them from the wrath of the Head Nurse every time they left the infirmary without her permission).

Left without much of a choice, Kanda had stormed off first. Allen had to rush to keep up with Kanda.

To be honest, Allen was actually somewhat glad to go on a mission alone with Kanda. Kanda's strength was really not a laughing matter. Even though Allen's Innocence was finally stabilized, there had not been many opportunities to train himself with it.

After much effort (coercion) on Allen's part, Kanda was finally livid enough to be willing to spar with Allen. Though somehow, Allen suspected that Kanda's intention may be just to send him kissing the ground as punishment for daring to threaten him.

Two weeks into the mission, and Allen's fighting ability had improved thanks to the near deadly fights with Kanda.

Allen lunged himself straight at Kanda, managing to slash him with his claws. The cut was not that deep, and with Kanda's strange healing ability, the cuts rapidly closed up.

Once again, Allen was struck with the thought that Kanda really was full of mysteries.

The fact that even in the dark forest, Kanda was still able to counter every attack from Allen was truly impressive. Allen's activated Innocence was completely black, blending in to the darkness. Though his white cape would give him away, Allen had been manipulating both the cape and his Innocence at the same time, yet Kanda had never once missed.

Unlike Allen who was relying on the occasional flashes of light from Kanda's sword to aid him, Kanda had no such need.

"You really are strong." Allen quietly murmured, extending his cape to avoid Kanda.

Kanda glanced up at Allen, and though he did not say anything in reply, Allen knew he had heard his words. Allen lost count of the amount of times Kanda had sent him sprawling across the ground, but at least he had managed to push Kanda to the point where he had also fallen.

Well, it was only twice but Allen took pride in that. He wasn't the only one getting a beating!

 _Shit!_

Allen had evaded one attack, only to realise that it was a false attack to cover the deadly, gleaming sword coming at him. Unable to dodge, Allen raised his left hand, attempting to catch the sword and use the momentum against Kanda. However, right at that moment, the town's clock chimed.

It was midnight.

Kanda pulled his sword away, and without waiting for Allen, he dashed off towards the nearby town. Allen was left to catch up to Kanda.

 _Again, I am always chasing after Kanda._ Allen grumbled to himself. A forlorn look broke Allen's usual smiling façade, and thoughts that he had always kept locked within him rose to the surface. _If I can't even catch up to him physically, trying to touch upon his emotions is more than impossible._

As Kanda's figure came into view, Allen quickly put on a serious expression.

 _Not yet, I won't let Kanda find out about these feelings. It is still too early._

"Until you acknowledge me as someone who can stand beside you, I will never let you find out." Allen whispered, his words carried away by the wind.

* * *

"Moyashi! The tower!" Kanda shouted as he sliced an Akuma into half.

"I know!" Allen growled back, desperately trying to make a pathway between the Akuma surrounding him. The Innocence was in the tower, but retrieving it was a tricky matter. Every day at midnight, the Innocence would plunge the entire town into darkness, and everyone who remained in the town would be turned into statues.

Outsides are not affected, which was why Kanda and Allen had to stay away from the town once night had fallen and only entered it once it was midnight. During the day, the Innocence casted a barrier around the tower so strong that Allen and Kanda could not forcefully break through it.

To make matters worse, the people of the town treasured their tower and when the two exorcists had first attempted to break it, they flew into a rage. Kanda and Allen were given a severe warning from the mayor and that they would be thrown out and not allowed back in if any of the town's people witness them attacking the tower again.

So they could only move during the night. But at midnight, the Innocence drew hordes of Akuma to the town attempting to take the Innocence. But when the Akuma came into contact with the tower, they would explode. Allen did not want to see Akuma exploding and the souls along with it. He would guard the tower and save the souls of the Akuma before they came into contact with the tower.

Allen and Kanda were both stuck, unable to come up with a way to retrieve the Innocence. After all, if they just snatched the Innocence, the people would forever remain as statues.

Kanda drew the Akuma's attention with his exorcist uniform, and Allen would circle the tower, protecting it. But now, Allen could not make it to the tower because the Akuma this time was a lot more than the previous days. Every time an Akuma would explode, Allen's heart twisted with pain.

Hurry, he had to hurry and reach the tower!

"Oi, Moyashi! What are you doing? Didn't you say that you wanted to save Akuma?" Kanda threw a glare towards Allen.

Allen gritted his teeth.

"I will!"

Allen could not ask for Kanda's help to push back the Akuma around him because Kanda had to deal with his own horde of Akuma bend on killing him. And one other reason was that he did not want to be seen as weak. Now was not a time for this, Allen knew. But no matter how much he argued and fought with Kanda, there is still a certain part of him that always wanted Kanda's acknowledgement no matter what.

Over and over, the sounds of Akuma exploding pierced his ears.

Stop it, stop destroying the pitiful souls within the Akuma!

Allen's mask slid down and covered half of his face.

"My left is for the Akuma, my right is for the humans. Let's go, Crown Clown!"

Allen gripped his left arm with his right hand, and pulled.

With the Sword of Exorcism in his right hand, Allen shot forward, slicing through the Akuma around him in a wide circle. A cross stamp appeared on those Akuma he touched, freeing the souls trapped within the Akuma. He dashed towards the tower, managing to save three Level One Akuma before they exploded.

Now that he had made it to the tower, Allen relaxed a little.

He meticulously stopped every single Akuma that came his way, and not a moment too soon, Kanda landed next to him.

"Kanda…"

"What, Moyashi?"

"It's Allen, BaKanda! Anyway, I've been thinking about the Innocence. Do you think that it may be the Heart?"

Kanda did not reply immediately, choosing to cut down the looming Level Twos instead. Finally, he grunted, "It may be. It seems sentient enough."

"Then, we can't it fall into the hands of the Akuma or Noah. But at this rate, the Noah will surely turn up soon."

"Hurry and think of a way to get it out, Moyashi."

"Don't just push it to me! You help out too, BaKanda!"

"Damn Moyashi, you always like to make things complicated! Just like that time when we were retrieving the Innocence from the Ghost of Mater. So you think of something this time."

"Damn you, BaKanda!"

Allen fumed, turning away from Kanda and focusing on the Akuma instead. As Allen quickly reduced the number of Akuma on his side, he noticed something strange. A Level Two Akuma was hesitating to join in; it would approach the tower, and then move back a little.

That was strange.

A Level Two Akuma that was not targeting them nor the Innocence, something like that was beyond rare. Was there something that caught the Akuma's attention instead?

Eventually, the Level Two Akuma made a decision and dashed off.

"Kanda, I'm leaving them to you!" Allen called back as he ran after the Akuma.

"Damn Moyashi!"

Allen heard Kanda cursing after him, but he was more preoccupied with the Level Two Akuma to pay much attention to Kanda. Allen sneakily followed the Akuma, making sure to hide himself well. The Level Two had turned back multiple times, and Allen nearly got caught.

But his skills in running away (and hiding) from General Cross's debtors were not for show. The Level Two might be suspicious about the presence of Innocence, but it would most probably assume it to be from the tower.

The Akuma stopped in front of a house, glancing around.

And then Allen saw what was attracting the Akuma's attention. There was a baby shifting around restlessly in the crib. In the town where everyone was frozen into statues, a moving human was like a beacon in a storm. Allen knew. This baby, it was most likely the Accommodator.

Allen slowly took a couple of steps forward, watching the Level Two. He kept his sword by his side, ready to attack.

The Level Two would look around again and again, and then moved towards the baby a little at a time.

A frown crossed Allen's face.

The Level Two was weird. Rather than looking out for approaching exorcists, it was more like it was _seeking_ out the exorcists. Allen's eyes narrowed as he slinked back into the cover of the building.

And then Allen began to assess the situation before him in a different light.

The sudden appearance of a baby that neither Kanda nor Allen noticed even after two weeks of scouting out the town. If the baby really was an Accommodator, left alone in a frozen town at night, why had it not once cried out during the past couple of weeks?

Unless, that baby was something that was only 'brought in'. Just like Kanda and Allen, if a normal baby were to enter the town once the Innocence was activated, it would not be under the effects of the Innocence. But, it was a baby. It could not enter by itself, someone should have brought it in.

As the Akuma inched closer to the baby, Allen's eyes widened.

It's a trap!

Allen spun around, dashing out of where he was hiding.

 _Kanda!_

Allen jumped over rooftops, taking the shortest route possible. The monocle on his left eye whirred, giving just enough warning for Allen to raise his sword, blocking the Akuma's attack.

This was the Level Two that had strayed away from the group.

"Exorcist! Too late, too late! Die!"

Allen gritted his teeth, not willing to let the Akuma provoke him.

"Kanda is not weak, and neither am I! Pitiful soul of the Akuma, rest in peace!" With a swing of his sword, Allen slashed the Akuma in half. As the female soul within the Akuma was freed from the chains, a happy, grateful smile appeared on her face.

Allen's lips involuntarily smiled, even though he was distraught with worry for Kanda.

"…Ex..orcist…Too late…Noah-sama's orders…too late, exorcist."

The Akuma managed to throw out a few more words before it vanished.

 _Noah?_ Allen trembled, eyes wide with horror. _No, Kanda!_

Allen dashed towards the tower, desperately seeking out Kanda's figure.

A familiar view of long blue hair flowing in the wind instantly calmed most of Allen's fear. But the next second, the fear returned full force as Allen had a good look at who Kanda was fighting against. Striped candles surrounded Kanda, shooting pass him as he dodged them.

Road.

When Allen made it to the tower, Road suddenly turned away from attacking Kanda and threw herself into Allen's arms.

"Allen!" Road joyfully called, laying a kiss onto Allen's cheek.

"…Road. I will not let you take the Innocence." Allen warned, keeping his sword ready by his side.

Road abruptly pushed away from Allen, narrowly missing the attack from Kanda.

"How uncouth to attack someone when they have their back turned, Exorcist." Road pouted.

She spun around in the air, and then positioned herself behind Allen, holding on tight.

"Alleeen! Don't attack me, okay? I have no interest in this Innocence, so you can have it." Road smiled.

Both Kanda and Allen paused, and their eyes narrowed with suspicion.

"Then why are you here?" Allen asked.

"I just came to inform you of some good news." Road giggled. "Very soon, something fun will happen!"

"Fun?"

Road nodded.

"That's why, Allen, you have to move fast. Because you won't have time once everything starts." Road whispered into Allen's ear.

Allen flinched.

He saw how Road had very quickly glanced at Kanda as she spoke. Did Road know?

Road lightly jumped away from Allen, and her door materialised behind her.

"I'll bring the Akuma back with me. You should hurry, Allen." Road laughed as she disappeared through her door.

"Oi, Moyashi. Explain."

"Explain? Explain what?"

"Why did that Noah run off without taking the Innocence?"

"…"

Kanda was glaring at Allen. And Allen returned the glare, but his mind was a mess. Road knew, absolutely, without a doubt. She knew of Allen's feelings towards Kanda.

"I don't know." Allen answered. Then, he quickly continued, "The Akuma has left. We should hurry and search for the Accommodator. There should be one here, it is the only way we can retrieve the Innocence."

"Che." Kanda turned around, jumping across rooftops and leaving Allen behind.

He watched Kanda's distant back. A sudden stab of pain ran through his heart.

Allen frowned, but went the other way.

* * *

"Damn it. How can there be no Accommodator?" Kanda fumed, swinging his sword towards Allen.

"Perhaps the Accommodator left the town?" Allen replied, blocking Kanda's sword with his own. Compared to Kanda, Allen's swordsmanship skills were just a little better than his ability with a bow and arrow. That is, of course, non-existent.

"It's been two and a half weeks! That's more than enough time to return!" Kanda growled.

"The average speed of a normal human is too complicated for you to calculate huh, BaKanda?"

"Damn Moyashi. I'll slice you up."

"Try it."

The constant sounds of swords meeting echoed in the forest, bringing life to the otherwise dead silent night.

* * *

"Kanda, Kanda!" Allen hurriedly called to Kanda who was mediating not too far away.

"What, Moyashi?"

"It's Allen, Bakanda! Look over there, someone is entering the town!"

Kanda was by Allen's side just three seconds later, and they both quietly watch a young man slowly dragging his feet as he entered the town.

The moment he stepped through the gates, a green glow surrounded him quickly before disappearing without a trace. The barrier created by the Innocence seemed to weaken.

"…Kanda…"

"I'll take the man, you go grab the Innocence." Kanda relayed the orders before quickly chasing after the man.

Again, Allen was left staring at Kanda's figure getting smaller and smaller.

"Once again, I'm chasing after you." Allen murmured.

 _Stab_

A sharp pain accompanied those words.

"It hurts, BaKanda."

Allen clenched his hands into fists as he began to make his way into the town.

* * *

"Hurry up, Moyashi."

Kanda was ahead of him, but as he turned around, a frown of impatience covered his face. The man was slung over Kanda's shoulder like a sack of potatoes. Because the man was causing too much of a fuss, Kanda had knocked him out.

Allen was carefully holding onto the Innocence. The man had refused to sync with the Innocence even though it had listened to the man and returned the town to normal. Hopefully, once they were back at the Headquarters, the man would be more willing to become an exorcist.

"You are too fast, BaKanda!"

"You're just too slow, you damn Moyashi."

"Why do you want to return so quickly anyway? It's not like the Head Nurse will allow you to leave the infirmary once you return."

"I'm already healed."

"Liar!"

"Hurry up, Moyashi. Or I will just leave you behind."

Kanda turned around and continued to cross the forest at rapid speed.

"But you already have left me behind too often, BaKanda." Allen whispered, running after Kanda.

* * *

"Kanda! Behind you!"

"You're so noisy, Moyashi!"

Allen watched as Kanda whipped around, slicing the Level Three Akuma in half. Only, his sword stopped halfway through the Akuma.

"Damn!"

Kanda pulled his sword away, jumping back just in time to avoid the heavy swing of the Akuma's arm covered with Dark Matter.

Allen himself was busy protecting both the Innocence and the man (who was knocked out by Kanda once again); he did not stray too far away from the man. There were very few exorcists, so to be able to find one was rare. There was no way Allen would let the Akuma kill off one who would be their potential comrade.

"So this was what he meant when he said that the sword may be weak!" Kanda growled, recalling Komui's words. This Mugen was too blunt and brittle. If he used too much force, the sword would break, yet if he didn't, the sword could not cut through the Akuma cleanly.

"The limit is a Level Three? Levels Ones and Level Twos can be sliced up easily." Kanda hummed to himself.

"Exorcists! Die!" A Level Two Akuma screeched, but instead of attacking Allen or Kanda, it went for the man who was propped against a tree.

"Crown Belt!"

Allen managed to pull the man away in time, and he brought his sword down on the Akuma. He did not stop there, making sure to keep the man safe from danger, Allen quickly brought down the Akuma around him. He also stabbed his sword through a Level Three's abdomen, destroying the Akuma that Kanda did not manage to finish.

Kanda was facing off against another Level Three, the only remaining Akuma.

Against a Level Three with faulty equipment, Kanda was having a hard time. But before Allen could help, with a furious shout, Kanda slashed his sword down on the Akuma with enough force to split it in half all the way.

The Akuma was destroyed, but so was Kanda's sword.

Kanda's sword lay in pieces on the ground, and he silently stooped to pick them up.

Allen deactivated his Innocence, slowly approaching Kanda.

"…Komui can fix it when we get back." Allen softly commented.

Kanda turned his head, glaring at Allen.

"Damn Moyashi. Because of how slow you are, we encountered those Akuma!" Kanda hissed.

Allen flinched back.

 _Stab Stab Stab_

Allen quickly turned around, trying to regulate his breathing around the pain in his heart.

"Then let's hurry and get back." Allen said, walking over to the man and picking him up carefully.

When Allen began to make his way back onto the path home, he noticed that Kanda was already quite far ahead from him.

"…It really hurts, stupid Kanda."

Allen huffed, holding back the tears that threatened to spill over.

His grip on the man tightened as he followed after Kanda.

* * *

"Allen-kun! Welcome back!"

Komui enthusiastically greeted Allen just as he stepped in.

"I'm back." Allen smiled.

"Kanda has already made his way to the cafeteria. You must be hungry, right? Hand over our potential exorcist and the Innocence, quickly go get some food before the Head Nurse drags you back into the infirmary!" Komui was already reaching out for the man.

"Thank you, Komui." Allen said gratefully as he handed the Innocence to Komui.

Komui happily waved Allen away.

Allen took slow steps towards the cafeteria. He was not in the mood to eat, but to sustain his Innocence, Allen needed to eat.

After ordering a smaller than usual amount of food, Allen quietly began to devour them.

Out of the corner of his eyes, he saw Kanda eating his usual soba tempura set. Allen slowed his eating pace to match that of Kanda's, so that Allen would finish eating the same time as Kanda.

Allen did not know what he was hoping for, but he could not stop his actions.

When Allen finished his meal and saw that Kanda was also done, he quickly stood up and cleared his tray of plates first. He made it out of the cafeteria before Kanda, but soon enough, he was overtaken. Damn Kanda. Damn his long legs.

Allen grumbled in his mind, though he did not once glance at Kanda who was ahead of him (like always).

But Kanda suddenly stopped.

He turned around, and walked straight up to Allen.

Allen was staring at Kanda in shock.

Kanda was glaring at him, but he also seemed to be… embarrassed? No, no, no. This is Kanda, it was impossible for him to get embarrassed. Antarctica would most likely melt first.

Kanda raised his hand, and Allen twitched.

Was Kanda going to hit him?

But Kanda only laid his hand on Allen's head, gently ruffling his hair.

Allen was staring at Kanda, completely stupefied.

"Good work on the mission, Moyashi."

After saying that, Kanda spun around and rapidly disappeared down a corridor.

What was that?

Allen gaped after Kanda.

Did he just see Kanda smile? Kanda. Smiling. At Allen. And his gentle touch.

Maybe… Maybe Kanda felt a little guilty? Or was there something else behind his actions?

Hope soared within Allen.

It was dangerous, too dangerous. If Allen got his hopes up and yet it turns out that Kanda did not like him _that way_ then… Allen would only be hurting himself even more.

But…

A little smile crept onto Allen's lips, and it was as though a heavy weight had been lifted from him.

With light steps, Allen reached his room. The Head Nurse would come after him very soon, but right now, Allen did not care.

As he threw himself on his bed, soft chuckles overcame him.

"Hey, Kanda. It's okay if I hope, right? It's okay if I take more steps towards you, right?"

Allen clutched onto his pillow.

"Wait for me, Kanda. Soon, soon, I will reach you. And then I will tell you these words within my heart."

With a gentle sigh, Allen closed his eyes.

 _I love you, Kanda._

* * *

 **End.**


End file.
